[1] A schnoodle is a cross between a schnauzer and a poodle. A schnoodle is a doodle but not all doodles are schnoodles. From the poodle, the schnoodle inherits intelligence and trainability. From the schnauzer? Athleticism, vocal cords, and an adorable mustache.

Puppy tax, paid in full:

[2] Schnauzers are spunky and highly spirited farm dogs that originated in Germany. Miniature schnauzers were originally bred to be ratters.

[3] In place of a National Guard deployment, Americans' tax dollars might be better spent funding an army of miniature schnauzers in Washington, DC. Residents of The Flats at Dupont Circle have famously carried weapons to bed to protect themselves against cat-sized rodents, and vermin continue to play joyfully amidst the trash cans adjacent the dugout at Guy Mason field. In Adams Morgan, DC's Department of Health is piloting the use of birth-control laced bait.

[4] If one is going to pursue a career in ratting, they would be wise to protect themselves with a vaccine for leptospirosis.

[5] A full round of puppy vaccinations in Veracruz, Mexico will set you back an average of $85–$175. For the same vaccinations in Washington, DC, you should expect to pay closer to $375. This is largely due to the prevalence of private equity in our vet care.

[6] In the United States, private equity has also visibly impacted healthcare, retail, prisons, local media and private colleges. The industry's impact on pest control, though, is widely underreported.

[7] If you're in the mood for ratatouille, IMHO you can't go wrong with this sheet pan recipe from Melissa Clark at the New York Times.

[8] One litter of puppies can belong to multiple fathers! The phenomenon is known as superfecundation.

[9] Superfecundation is common in urban rats. Although, when given a choice, female rats prefer to mate with a dominant male.